Four steps for resolving conflict

Conflict resolution is a process which aims to reduce disagreement. It takes time, but it reaps huge rewards.

The benefits of resolving conflict include better team dynamics, less personal stress and increased creativity. The aim of conflict resolution is to create fair solutions, which everyone can agree to. There are five steps involved in resolving conflict.

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Handling family conflict at Christmas

Christmas gatherings can be tough. Old relationship dynamics can set in and conflict can emerge.

If you want to experience less stress during your family’s Christmas celebrations, you need to abandon old behaviour patterns. Here are three ways to do this.

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How to communicate your boundaries

Keeping your personal boundaries intact is the key to maintaining your psychological safety. Here’s how to assert your boundaries when someone invades them.

Your boundaries define the ‘space’ you place between yourself and others – both physically and psychologically. Healthy boundaries help you make appropriate contact with others. Unhealthy boundaries can create a sense of detachment or over-dependence on others.

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Stop verbal abuse now

Verbally abusive people use tactics like shouting, swearing, mocking, sarcasm and veiled threats. Their aim is to intimidate and control you.

You don’t have to put up with verbal abuse. Whether it happens at work or at home, there is something you can do about it. Here are four steps to take when you’re the target of verbal abuse.

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Workplace mobbing

Chris and Ross are furious. They’ve both applied for the team leader role. But the job has been given to Brett.

Brett is the youngest member of the team. To Chris and Ross, this means he wasn’t entitled to a promotion. Rather than expressing their anger openly, they resort to passive aggressive tactics. These include deliberately making mistakes, pretending to forget important deadlines and muttering ‘care factor zero’ when Brett talks to the team.

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Get active about passive-aggression

Passive aggression is way of covertly expressing anger. It involves using incongruent words, tones and body language to convey contempt. For example, someone might say the words “I don’t have a problem.” The meaning of these words might be totally undermined by the speaker’s voice-tone. This is a passive aggressive way of raising a problem.

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Managing Irrational People

Stella’s performance just wasn’t up to scratch. Kath, her supervisor, was keen to help Stella improve. But whenever Kath gave Stella feedback, the conversation got out of control.

Stella seemed unable to accept any form of feedback without becoming defensive. No matter how Kath worded her message, it triggered tirades and tears. Feeling at a loss about what to do next, Kath came to my course on Dealing with Difficult People.

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Break the rude email cycle

Terence was furious. He’d just received another abrupt, demanding email from his colleague, Tamara. He was fed up with her tone.

Terence came to me for advice on how to handle Tamara. Over three coaching sessions, he learned how to manage her behaviour professionally and assertively. Here are the steps Terence used to request that Tamara change her ways. You can use the same steps to handle colleagues who send rude emails.

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How to empathise with angry customers

Stephen was a customer support officer in a large software company. Years of listening to customer complaints had taken their toll. He was losing patience with his customers.

After a heated conversation with a customer led to a complaint, Stephen’s supervisor enrolled him in my course Handling Difficult Customers. In the first half of the course, we discussed the importance of showing empathy when customers experience problems. Stephen asked “Why should I show empathy when the customer is swearing at me?”

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Trish needed to break news her clients didn’t want to hear. She wondered how to make the process easier.

Although Trish was an auditor, her question was one many professionals ask. Doctors, lawyers and Human Resources practitioners are just three examples of people who regularly need to deliver unpopular messages. Does your work involve breaking bad news or giving critical feedback? Then you’ll be interested in the advice we gave Trish’s team in their custom-designed training program.

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