Do you ever feel like no matter how many compliments you receive, it’s the criticism that sticks with you? You’re not alone. This tendency is known as the “negativity bias.” It means that your brain is wired to pay more attention to negative stimuli. Plus, it remembers negative experiences more vividly. This explains why it seems easier to focus on the downsides of a situation than to be optimistic.

Sadly, the negative bias also influences the way many people give feedback. Many people know that negative feedback tends to be more impactful and produce quicker results, so they get into the habit of giving more negative feedback than affirming comments.

Let’s illustrate this with an example. Imagine your supervisor asked you to submit a report with very short notice. When you turned it in, they said “It could have been better” and pointed out a few areas for improvement.

If you tend to be thin-skinned, this feedback might feel like a blow to your self-esteem. However, if you examine this situation more closely, you can interpret it in different ways. Here are few alternatives.

1. Compared to your previous work, this report falls short of expectations.
2. The information was there, but it wasn’t presented as clearly as expected.
3. There were no major mistakes, but it didn’t stand out either.

Now, let’s explore two ways you can respond assertively to negative feedback. Without feeling like a failure.

Get clarity.

Instead of feeling powerless in the face of criticism, ask questions and seek more detailed feedback. Understanding what prompted the negative feedback will make it feel less overwhelming and more actionable.

Focus on the positives.

When we perceive feedback as negative, we often overlook any positive aspects. Instead of reacting immediately, take a moment to consider what the feedback is really asking for. There may be valuable insights hidden within it.

By implementing these strategies, you can gradually lessen the grip of fear and criticism on your life. Remember, it’s essential to reframe your perspective and recognise that critiques are opportunities for growth and improvement.

More from the original article here.

This article summary was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer, success coach and people skills expert. She helps managers and business owners build thriving teams and organisations, using tools from Positive Psychology. She's trained more than 60,000 people during her career as a corporate trainer and professional development consultant. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference.