Increase your impact with mental workouts

Do emotional exercises really improve mental health?

That’s the question posed by Washington Post wellness columnist in a recent article. According to the article, there is growing evidence that emotional exercises can help improve mental health, especially for people who are not responding to traditional therapy.

The article cites a study published in the journal Frontiers in Psychology which found that emotional exercises can be an effective treatment for anxiety and depression. The study involved more than 1,500 participants who were randomly assigned to one of three groups – a control group, an exercise group, or a cognitive therapy group.

The exercise group was asked to do thirty minutes of aerobic exercise three times a week, while the cognitive therapy group received twelve sessions of cognitive behaviour therapy. The control group did not receive any treatment.

After eight weeks, the results showed that the exercise group had lower levels of anxiety and depression than the control group. They also had higher levels of self-esteem and were more physically active. The cognitive therapy group fared better than the exercise group, but not as well as the control group.

So what do these findings mean for managers and business owners?

There is growing evidence that emotional exercises can be an effective treatment for mental health issues like anxiety and depression. This means that businesses should consider offering these types of exercises to their employees as part of their wellness programs. Emotional exercises are activities or tasks that help you become more aware of your feelings and emotions. They can help you understand and manage your emotions better.

 

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There is evidence that emotional exercises can be very effective at treating mental illness. However, they can also be beneficial for healthy people too. Emotional exercises can help you manage stress, anxiety and anger. They can also improve your mood and overall well-being.

There are many different types of emotional exercises, but some of the most popular include mindfulness meditation, journaling and cognitive behavioural therapy.

Employees who participate in emotional exercises are likely to be less stressed and more productive. They may also be less likely to take time off work due to mental health issues.

Find out more in the original article here: https://www.washingtonpost.com/wellness/2022/09/28/emotional-exercises-for-mental-health/?itid=sf_wellbeing_wellbeing_Mind

This article summary was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer, success coach and people skills expert. She helps managers and business owners build thriving teams and organisations, using tools from Positive Psychology. She's trained more than 60,000 people during her career as a corporate trainer and professional development consultant. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference. 

 

Can’t quit that bad habit? Blame ‘secondary gain’

Do you ever find yourself stuck in a cycle of self-sabotaging behaviours? It’s soooo frustrating, isn’t it? The sensible part of you is saying ‘No! Don’t do this again’. Meanwhile, that other part of you is whispering ‘It’s easier to do it this way’ or ‘I’ll quit tomorrow’. Sigh. Why do you keep doing this?

Well, the answer is simple: you are getting a ‘secondary gain’ out of it. A secondary gain is a reward, either tangible or psychological, that you are reaping from your behaviour. This benefit can range from feeling comforted, to gaining attention or avoiding responsibilities.

Yes, it’s sad but true: self-sabotaging behaviours have hidden benefits. That’s why smart people do things they know they shouldn’t. For instance, imagine a successful team leader who works long hours. She really resents working harder than anyone else. However, she keeps coming in early and staying back late. That’s because she is hooked on the praise she gets from her manager for handing in ‘perfect’ work. The praise is her secondary gain.

Knowing this gives the team leader a way to break her workaholic cycle for good. You see, if she finds a healthier way to do high-quality work, she won’t need to overwork. She could train her team to help her out, delegate more and focus on working strategically instead of being so hands-on.

 

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You can use this approach to habit change, too. If you identify what the secondary gain of any ‘bad’ habit is, you’ll be able to get some gain without the pain! Try this technique on any of these Top 10 low confidence  habits:

  1. Over-eating
  2. Procrastinating
  3. People-pleasing
  4. Working too hard
  5. Perfectionism
  6. Saying ‘yes’ when you want to say ‘no’
  7. Arguing
  8. Being disorganised
  9. Putting yourself down
  10. Staying out of the limelight

Remember,  no one is trapped forever in their ‘bad’ habits!  You can consciously choose to see the bigger picture, and make a plan to break your habit cycle. With an understanding of secondary gain as your guide, you can take steps towards creating healthier behaviour patterns.

This article was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer and success coach. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference.  Since discovering her passion for training and development, Eleanor has trained more than 60,000 people. She delivers face-to-face workshops for corporates, online masterclasses for leaders and Positive Psychology retreats for trainers, HR practitioners and leaders. 

Future-proof your brain, start dancing

What educators and parents should know about neuroplasticity, learning, and dance

Can movement change the way your brains work? According to the article in Sharp Brains, the answer is yes. Neuroplasticity is the brain’s ability to change its structure and function in response to experience. This means that you can learn new things and create new habits, even as you age. Dance is a great way to take advantage of neuroplasticity, because it involves both mental and physical activity. It can improve cognitive function and memory, as well as mood and emotional regulation.

The article cites a study that found that “dancing may improve cognitive function by enhancing neuroplasticity.” It goes on to say that “the brain is incredibly plastic, meaning it can change its structure and function in response to various experiences.” This is great news for educators and parents! It means that you can help you children learn by providing them with opportunities to engage in activities that are challenging and stimulating.

 

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So what does this mean for managers, business owners, and supervisors? It means that you need to be creative in your approach to employee development and training. First, by creating an environment that encourages employees to learn and grow. This could mean offering training opportunities or giving employees the freedom to experiment with new ideas. Second, by providing employees with breaks throughout the day so they can move their bodies and get some exercise. Finally, by promoting healthy lifestyles for employees, which will have a positive impact on their brains as well as their bodies.

This article shows that dance can be a useful tool for improving cognitive skills. Improving cognitive skills can lead to increased productivity and creativity in the workplace. It can also help employees stay focused and motivated. Creating a workplace that encourages employees to be physically active and engage in mentally stimulating activities will benefit the company as a whole.

Find more in the original article here: https://sharpbrains.com/blog/2016/01/22/what-educators-and-parents-should-know-about-neuroplasticity-learning-and-dance

This article summary was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer, success coach and people skills expert. She helps managers and business owners build thriving teams and organisations, using tools from Positive Psychology. She's trained more than 60,000 people during her career as a corporate trainer and professional development consultant. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference. 

 

Emotional labour is hard work

Are you the office mom? If so, your career is at risk.

That’s the conclusion of a new article by Melody Wilding for Forbes. According to Wilding, emotional labour – or the effort spent managing emotions – affects women’s careers more than men’s. And the office mom is often the one who bears the brunt of that burden.

The article discusses how women are often saddled with the majority of the emotional labour in the workplace. This can manifest itself in a number of ways, such as being responsible for managing relationships and handling tasks that are seen as ‘women’s work’. This can be extremely taxing and lead to women feeling overwhelmed and unsupported.

Emotional labour is the process of managing emotions in the workplace. It can include tasks such as cheering up a colleague who is having a bad day, handling customer complaints, or acting happy and enthusiastic even when you’re not feeling it. Women are often expected to shoulder the majority of emotional labour in the office, and this can take a toll on their careers.

There are several reasons for this. First, women are typically socialised to be more emotionally expressive than men. They’re also more likely to be responsible for tasks like organising team events and arranging childcare. All of these activities require emotional labour.

 

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But emotional labour doesn’t just affect women’s personal lives. It can also have a negative impact on their careers. For example, it can lead to feelings of burnout and frustration. It can also make it difficult to assert oneself in the workplace or to take on new challenges.

So what can managers, business owners and supervisors do to help? Here are three tips:

1) Be aware of the issue.

2) Encourage employees to take breaks.

3) Offer flexible work arrangements.

If you’re a woman in business, it’s important to be aware of the emotional labour you’re expected to perform. Take steps to manage your own emotions, and encourage your employees to do the same.

Find out more in the original article here: https://www.forbes.com/sites/melodywilding/2018/06/06/dont-be-the-office-mom-how-emotional-labor-affects-womens-careers/?sh=274620651103

This article summary was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer, success coach and people skills expert. She helps managers and business owners build thriving teams and organisations, using tools from Positive Psychology. She's trained more than 60,000 people during her career as a corporate trainer and professional development consultant. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference. 

 

Confidence is not a personality trait. You can learn it.

Are you surrounded by people who seem way more confident than you? Well, let me share a secret: many people APPEAR confident, but that doesn’t mean they’re naturally self-assured. It’s certainly not true that some people are ‘born confident’ or that confidence is part of your personality. Just like imposter syndrome, low confidence is caused by lots of factors. All of which you can overcome! Watch this week’s video for some insights into the real cause of imposter syndrome. Which is also one of the triggers for low confidence.

You see, confidence is not ‘part’ of you. It’s a mindset, which is  driven by your belief in your abilities. And those beliefs can change at any stage of  your life. In fact, brain research shows that you can rewire your brain and change your thinking habits from the cradle to the grave. And that’s great news. It means you’re never too young to be confident and… you’re never too old to be confident!

You can learn to activate confidence by mastering a few mind-management tools. I recommend using  Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) to build your emotional mastery, because they are quick to learn. For example, you can use NLP to trigger a confident state just by focusing your attention the right way. Did you know that your brain can’t tell the difference between what is real and what is imagined? That means you can change your mood just by using your imagination and your memory. Many NLP state management tools help you do this.

 

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Try this easy technique right now. Close your eyes and remember a time you WERE confident in the past. Replay that memory, paying attention to what you saw,  heard and felt during that confident experience.  Make the memory as vivid as you can.  Use all your senses as you remember how you ‘coded’ your confidence. You’ll soon notice yourself feeling more confident in real time. That’s because you’ve just activated your ‘confidence pathways’.

Thousands of people use NLP every day. And why is that? Because it’s fastest and easiest way to change your thinking and change your state. If you’d like more tips on using NLP or on building complete confidence, come along to one of my online classes. I’d love to help you master the art of confident thinking!

This article was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer and success coach. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference.  Since discovering her passion for training and development, Eleanor has trained more than 60,000 people. She delivers face-to-face workshops for corporates, online masterclasses for leaders and Positive Psychology retreats for trainers, HR practitioners and leaders. 

Beat imposter syndrome with confidence coaching

Become a more confident leader with confidence coaching

Low self-esteem. Feeling like an imposter. Most professionals experience these emotions at times. Let me help you overcome them. One-on-one confidence coaching gives you the mental tools to beat imposter syndrome. With personalised coaching, you can build greater confidence and self-esteem. Stop feeling as if you don’t belong.

Become a more confident leader by addressing your fears and anxieties. A variety of coaching packages are available to suit your specific needs. Get started with a free discovery session with success coach Eleanor Shakiba. Book your initial chat to find out how confidence coaching can help you flourish. Book a session

Six ways to win an argument

Can you win an argument without raising your voice? According to the article in the Guardian, the answer is yes. Here are six ways to do it:

  1. Use facts and statistics.
  2. Use authority figures or experts.
  3. Appeal to emotion.
  4. Use humour.
  5. Be persistent.
  6. Use force (or the threat of force). These techniques can be useful for business owners, managers and supervisors who need to resolve disagreements or disputes with employees, clients or suppliers. By using these methods, you can stay in control of the situation and achieve a positive outcome.

While some of these tactics may work in certain situations, they’re not always effective – and they can even backfire if used incorrectly. For example, making someone feel stupid can lead to them digging their heels in, while attacking their character can make them less likely to listen to your arguments in the future.

That said, there are some tactics that are worth using more often than others. Facts and statistics, for example, can be very persuasive – especially if they’re presented in a clear and concise way. And humour can be a great way to lighten the mood – provided it’s not at someone else’s expense.

If you need someone to do something they’re reluctant to do, such as take on extra work or come in on a weekend, using facts and statistics can be persuasive. You can point out that the extra work is necessary for the company to meet its goals or that other employees have already agreed to do it. If you need to make a tough decision, using authority figures or experts can help convince others that you’re making the right choice. And if you need to get people on your side during a negotiation, appealing to their emotions can be very effective.

 

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Of course, getting what you want isn’t always easy – it often takes persistence and sometimes force (or the threat of force) is necessary. But knowing these six techniques can give you a leg up in any argument.

It’s important to remember that there is no “one size fits all” approach when it comes to influencing people – what works in one situation may not work in another. However, by understanding the different techniques available to you and using them intelligently, you can dramatically increase your chances of getting what you want.

Overall, this article is a great resource for anyone who wants to be more persuasive in their dealings with others. It’s full of practical advice that can be put into action immediately.

Find out more in the original article here: https://www.theguardian.com/science/2019/jun/30/the-science-of-influencing-people-six-ways-to-win-an-argument

This article summary was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer, success coach and people skills expert. She helps managers and business owners build thriving teams and organisations, using tools from Positive Psychology. She's trained more than 60,000 people during her career as a corporate trainer and professional development consultant. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference. 

 

 

How to stop your ideas being stolen at work

Eeek. I was recently asked how long I’ve been teaching professionals how to deal with difficult colleagues. The answer was 28 years. In all that time, people problems have never gone away. Toxic bosses and nasty colleagues are still the leading causes of stress at work. Three types of difficult people get mentioned more than any others:  idea thieves, energy vampires and backstabbers. These characters star in almost every tale of office woe that I hear. So, I decided to share some tips on handling them.

Next, let’s look at energy vampires. These are people who suck out all the positive energy out of a room. They’re so negative, they can drain the motivation of even the most positive team. To protect yourself from their contagious moods, try using the ‘vampire shield’ technique. Imagine you have a solid wall around your workstation and the energy vampire is on the other side. No matter how hard they try to lob negative comments your way, their words just bounce back to them. It also helps to minimise contact with them, especially when there’s no-one else around.

Finally, let’s talk about backstabbers. It’s frustrating to have somebody bad mouth you in public or give distorted reports to your boss, isn’t it? So, what can you do about them? The best way to handle backstabbers is to expose their tactics. The simplest way to do is by asking questions such as “What evidence did they give you?” or “Can you give me an example of that?” when a backstabber’s opinion is reported back to you as fact. This exposes their tactics without baking you seemed concerned. After all, if something isn’t true, there is no reason to give it lots of attention.

 

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Remember, too, that difficult people give you an opportunity to shine at work. Staying calm and reasonable in response to their tactics will make you look confident and focused. It will also make you stand out as management material, because emotional intelligence (EQ) is not something everyone possesses. Great leaders, though, always have high EQ.

I hope these tips help you deal with difficult colleagues and protect yourself from office pests. To find out more, subscribe to my blog, sign up for one to one coaching with me or attend one of my upcoming workshops. Until then, stay safe and pest-free!

This article was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer and success coach. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference.  Since discovering her passion for training and development, Eleanor has trained more than 60,000 people. She delivers face-to-face workshops for corporates, online masterclasses for leaders and Positive Psychology retreats for trainers, HR practitioners and leaders. 

 

 

 

 

 

Send a message your boss won’t ignore

Have you ever had an idea for progress but feel like it’s not being heard when you present it to your boss? It can be incredibly frustrating and disheartening, especially when the same ideas are proposed by another person and suddenly get the green light. In an article Influencing Upward: The Skill You Need to Get Ahead, it provides invaluable advice on how managers, business owners, and supervisors can better influence decision makers in their workplace.

It outlines three key strategies for achieving this goal and getting ideas across effectively. Firstly, encourage readers to create a positive relationship with their boss by gaining intel on any goals or challenges they may have. Secondly, readers ‘earn the right’ to discuss their idea with their boss; this involves coming armed with data and facts that support the proposed solution. Thirdly, every idea should be presented in terms of value delivery – showing how the proposed solution would benefit everyone involved in the project. Linking ideas back to core objectives encourages understanding from decision makers and makes them more likely to agree with suggestions.

The article also mentions the need to develop a sense of empathy in order to gain trust and build a better relationship with decision makers. Knowing how they think and understanding their individual preferences helps readers create an approach that resonates with them, which could prove essential in getting ideas accepted.

 

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Having a good understanding of your immediate superiors’ needs helps create a level of trust between both parties which is crucial for getting ideas across effectively. Showing that you have done research into the problem and developed a feasible solution demonstrates that you’re capable of innovative thinking; this also shows ambition and respect for your employer which will further increase your chance of success. Being able to clearly explain how an idea can help achieve objectives is essential for conveying its merits – if there isn’t any evidence of tangible benefits from an idea then decision makers won’t take it seriously.

This article provides sound advice for anyone looking for ways to get ahead in business. By forming strong relationships with superiors, taking initiative through research and offering creative solutions underlined by value delivery – managers, business owners, and supervisors alike can learn how to better influence decision makers at work.

Find out more in the original article here: https://www.themuse.com/advice/influencing-upward-the-skill-you-need-to-get-ahead

This article summary was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer, success coach and people skills expert. She helps managers and business owners build thriving teams and organisations, using tools from Positive Psychology. She's trained more than 60,000 people during her career as a corporate trainer and professional development consultant. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference. 

 

 

You CAN be resilient and emotionally fragile at the same time

Too many leaders believe they should never experience doubt, uncertainty,  or low spirits. There’s  a big myth out there: that resilience equals never-ending positivity. And that just isn’t true. The truth is that successful leaders can be resilient and emotionally fragile at the same time. With the right techniques, you can turn this vulnerability into a leadership strength. Learn how Neuro Linguistic Programming can help you do this, in a 2-minute video from peak performance coach, Eleanor Shakiba.

 

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