Irrational behaviour can be confusing or annoying. But with a bit of know-how you can handle it professionally. Here are some steps mental health professionals use to manage people who aren’t thinking straight. You can use them, too, when dealing with irrational people.
Yes, reading a rude email can push your buttons. But before you hit ‘reply’ remember that this is your chance to look good. Remember the power of the written word and keep your reply calm, cool and collected with these tips.
Finding it difficult to turn people down? Here’s how to say no when you need to.
The direct no
You may sometimes feel you need to explain why you’re saying no. The problem is, explanations are often heard as excuses. For some people, your excuse is an opportunity to persuade you to say ‘yes’.
A direct approach is often needed. And some ways of saying ‘no’ work better than others. Saying ‘I can’t/won’t’ gets straight to the point but the most likely instant response will be ‘why not?’ Before you know it, you’re in explanation territory again.
It’s a tiny word, but saying ‘no’ can seem a huge effort. Here’s how to say ‘no’ when you need to.
‘No, not now’
Sometimes you really want to say ‘yes’. You would be happy to help if only there was less on your plate. You really don’t want to miss out on that golden opportunity, if only you could fit it in. Be firm with yourself and honest with others. Let people know when you can accommodate their request, rather than saying ‘no’ outright.
‘No’ is one of the most powerful words in your vocabulary. Here’s why.
‘No’ prevents overload
If you’re the type of person who can’t say ‘no’, life is probably pretty hectic. What’s more, you’re probably doing a lot for everyone else and not much for you. And the likely result is that you feel stressed and over-stretched.
So remember – it’s simply not possible to do everything. Choose what you can do and then say ‘no’ to everything else. Saying ‘no’ to others means you say ‘yes’ to a stress-free life
Fed up with unwanted words of wisdom? Here’s how to handle advice you don’t need to hear.
Some people use advice giving to control you or put you down. Whether it’s the office know-all pointing out your mistakes or a pessimistic co-worker raining on your parade, don’t allow them to continue. There are three steps you need to take when dealing with unwanted advice.
Why do some people get a thrill from putting you down?
The answer is that they have low self-esteem. So don’t let their negativity get you down. These people only hold power over you because you’re uncomfortable about confronting them. Perhaps you’re not 100 per cent sure the remark was a dig. Or maybe you’re torn between wanting to burst into tears or telling them exactly what you think of them.
People who make biting remarks crave an audience. They rely on you listening passively. Don’t do it. Instead, respond assertively. When you challenge them, difficult people lose their hold over you immediately. Here’s how to do this calmly and resourcefully.
Your time is precious. Here’s how to reclaim it from the timewasters.
Does someone you work with bore you to tears with twenty minute monologues? Frequently interrupt you by stopping by your desk for a quick chat that goes on forever? Being sociable at work is great. But if you resent your time being taken up by over-talkers, these tips might come in handy.
Dean’s boss is driving him up the wall. Although Dean’s workload is already massive, Cass has handed him yet another ‘urgent’ report to do. How can Dean convince his boss that her demands are unreasonable?
There’s only one thing for it – Dean needs to be assertive. He needs tell his boss there’s an issue so she can understand his position. Here’s how we’d help Dean deal with this problem. You can use the same strategies to negotiate priorities with your boss.
Although Elaine likes her new job, her coworkers tend to gossip. Elaine frequently feels uncomfortable, but doesn’t know whether to speak up or keep quiet.
People talk about others. But when talk becomes negative or personal it moves from conversation to gossip. As Elaine’s uncomfortable with what’s being said, there’s a good chance the topic of conversation won’t like it either. Here’s how we’d help Elaine deal with this problem. You can use the same strategies to tackle gossip in your workplace.