Speak the language of influence

First-rate negotiators are adroit influencers. They know how to subtly guide their counterparts’ thinking by making smart linguistic choices. These are word choices that prime a listener to give a positive reaction. Think about the most influential people you know. I bet they’re skilled in the art of priming. They keep others on-side by framing their messages in positive and collaborative language. This means they get ‘yes’ responses more frequently.

 

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Make your message stick

Want people to listen to you? Then you need to present a compelling message. Here are three ways to make a message take hold.

Speak their language

picPeople listen to what makes sense to them. This means you need to frame your message from their perspective. For example, there’s a big difference between the following two statements. Which would you be most likely to listen to?

  • Today I’m going to describe how the new computer program will streamline customer service processes in the business
  • Do you want a better way to close sales? The new program will help you do it!

 

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How to convince a critical audience

Mina was nervous. She was presenting a change plan to a team of auditors. She knew the change wouldn’t be popular. And she was facing a highly critical audience.

Here’s how we’d help Mina deal with this problem. You can use the same strategies to sell your ideas to resistant audiences – whether you’re presenting at a meeting, giving a formal speech or seeking to change one person’s mind.

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Ancient wisdom for modern presenters

Aristotle developed a theory of persuasive speech writing in 320 B.C. His theory is still used by master speech writers today.

You, too, can tap into Aristotle’s wisdom by using the three forms of ‘rhetoric’ he described. These were ethos, logos and pathos.

Ethos

Ethos means ‘character.’ If you’re speaking to people who value expertise, ethos is your key to success. Your ethos builds even before you walk on stage. For example, when your photo is included in promotional material, it starts to build ethos. Invest in a professional head shot if you present a lot. The way you’re introduced also impacts on your ethos. Don’t leave your introduction to chance – prepare an introductory spiel for the MC. Make sure this highlights your qualifications, achievements and current job title.

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Managing Irrational People

Stella’s performance just wasn’t up to scratch. Kath, her supervisor, was keen to help Stella improve. But whenever Kath gave Stella feedback, the conversation got out of control.

Stella seemed unable to accept any form of feedback without becoming defensive. No matter how Kath worded her message, it triggered tirades and tears. Feeling at a loss about what to do next, Kath came to my course on Dealing with Difficult People.

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Trish needed to break news her clients didn’t want to hear. She wondered how to make the process easier.

Although Trish was an auditor, her question was one many professionals ask. Doctors, lawyers and Human Resources practitioners are just three examples of people who regularly need to deliver unpopular messages. Does your work involve breaking bad news or giving critical feedback? Then you’ll be interested in the advice we gave Trish’s team in their custom-designed training program.

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How to make change positive

Sean was preparing to announce the relocation of the company’s head office. Some staff might react badly to this change. How could he get everyone onside?

Sean needed to prepare his presentation very carefully. I helped him use NLP framing techniques to build a positive message. You can use the same techniques whenever you need to announce a change or introduce challenging news.

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Handling irrational people: Four steps for success

Irrational behaviour can be confusing or annoying. But with a bit of know-how you can handle it professionally. Here are some steps mental health professionals use to manage people who aren’t thinking straight. You can use them, too, when dealing with irrational people.

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Keep control of difficult conversations

Dreading the drama of a crunch point conversation? These four steps will help you through conversations with difficult people

Yes. Other people behave badly sometimes. But there are constructive ways you can broach tricky subjects, minimise conflict and move beyond impasses. Here are five ways to get started.

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Amplify Your Influence: Steps for Success

Are you struggling to get others to listen to you? These strategies will help you get through to them

Widen your perspective

To influence others, you need to make what you say matter to them. Look at your proposal from their perspective as well as from your own. What benefits are important to them? How will what you want also help them? Be as specific as possible and keep in mind that different people have different needs and aspirations. Tailor what you say to the particular person you say it to.

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