By Eleanor Shakiba Credibility interesting articles 0 Comments

Power up your assertiveness today

Do you know what it takes to be a successful leader? According to this recent article by Lolly Daskal, it takes seven powerful habits. This article outlines these habits and explains how they can help managers, business owners, and supervisors become more assertive.

The seven habits listed in this article will help you become more assertive and successful. They are:

The first habit is knowing your wants. You need to take some time for introspection and honestly ask yourself what you want out of life. Once you know your wants, the next step is to come up with a plan on how to get them. This usually involves setting goals and creating a roadmap to achieving them.

The second habit is self-awareness. You need to be aware of your strengths, weaknesses, and triggers. Knowing this information will help you stay in control during challenging situations.

The third habit is managing your emotions. It’s important to not let your emotions get the best of you. Stay calm and focused when things get tough.

The fourth habit is self-confidence. Believe https://www.lollydaskal.com/leadership/7-powerful-habits-that-make-you-more-assertive

 

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The fifth habit is communication skills. Learning how to communicate effectively will help you get your point across while maintaining relationships.

The sixth habit is assertiveness. Be assertive in your actions and words; this will help you get what you want while still respecting others’ rights and feelings.

The seventh and final habit is responsibility. Take responsibility for your own happiness and success; don’t rely on others to do it for you.

Each of these habits is explained in detail, and includes examples of how to apply them in your own life. For example, under the habit “take action”, the article recommends breaking down your goals into small steps so that you can make progress every day. This is a great way to stay motivated and on track. Assertiveness skills are important because they allow leaders to communicate effectively, set boundaries, and stand up for what they believe in. Leaders who possess these skills are more likely to succeed than those who do not.

These seven habits will help you become more assertive in any situation. But why should managers, business owners and supervisors care? Because being more assertive can lead to better decisions, improved communication and better relationships with employees and customers. So try out these habits and see how they work for you.

Find out more in the original article here: https://www.lollydaskal.com/leadership/7-powerful-habits-that-make-you-more-assertive

This article summary was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer, success coach and people skills expert. She helps managers and business owners build thriving teams and organisations, using tools from Positive Psychology. She's trained more than 60,000 people during her career as a corporate trainer and professional development consultant. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference. 

 

 

By Eleanor Shakiba Credibility tips 0 Comments

The dangers of being too humble: a warning for female leaders

The importance of humility in leadership is often touted by leadership experts. For example, it is widely claimed that humility allows leaders to effectively engage with their teams, understand divergent viewpoints and foster unity. However, it’s important to remember that there is also a downside to being too humble at work. In fact, being excessively humble is simply a sign of imposter syndrome.

For female leaders, the dangers of ‘over-humbling’ can be particularly grave. When women are excessively humble, they can unwittingly reduce their credibility with both peers and team members. If you’ve ever done this, you’ll know how much it can reduce your ability to make an impact as a manager or business owner. Sadly, this is a situation that can be used against female leaders by those seeking to undermine their authority or discredit their ideas. This is why I spend so much time teaching women to focus on shining, rather than self-effacing.

Let’s face facts. Overly humble leaders can be taken advantage of by political players and self-aggrandising colleagues. This makes early-career leaders, in particular, vulnerable to power games and sabotage. Plus, because so many women loathe engaging in office politics, it puts female bosses and team leaders at a distinct disadvantage in large organisations. Even in organisations which run Women in Leadership training, this problem is rarely addressed.

 

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Secondly, when female leaders are overly humble, they don’t speak up for themselves. They back down from difficult conversations or make concessions way too early in negotiations. This can be disastrous when it comes to setting and maintaining boundaries with team members or clients – something that every manager and business owner regularly needs to do. It also prevents women asking for promotions or being fairly remunerated for their efforts as leaders.

Finally, being too humble can cause female leaders to miss out on promotions after first breaking the glass ceiling. If a woman is too humble to accept credit for her accomplishments, she risks blending into the background and not being taken seriously by higher-ups. This is a classic example of what happens when a leader has Chameleon Syndrome – a toxic need to fit in at all costs. There are three signs a manager has this mindset.

  • She’s too humble to shine
  • She’s too busy to make an impact
  • She’s too nice to speak up

If this sounds like you, there is some good news.  You can overcome Chameleon Syndrome by working on your credibility, impact and confidence. That’s why I designed my Complete Confidence with NLP course in 2022 and why women enrol in it 5 times as often as men.

To find out more about how I help females managers become leaders who make a difference, continue reading my posts. I’ll be giving you lots of useful advice on how to overcome Chameleon Syndrome over the coming weeks.

This article was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer and success coach. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference.  Since discovering her passion for training and development, Eleanor has trained more than 60,000 people. She delivers face-to-face workshops for corporates, online masterclasses for leaders and Positive Psychology retreats for trainers, HR practitioners and leaders. 

 

 

 

By Eleanor Shakiba Videos resilience 0 Comments

Leaders with mental stamina aren’t tough. They are wise.

What does it take to lead in tough times? Most people assume the answer is psychological toughness. But that isn’t true. Relying too much on mental fortitude  increases your risk of suffering from exhaustion and fatigue. A smarter option is to become a wise leader. In this video, you’ll learn how to do this by thinking flexibly. Watch now to hear leadership coach, Eleanor Shakiba, explain 4 types of flexible thinking – and how you can use them to increase your mental stamina.

 

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By Eleanor Shakiba Credibility interesting articles 0 Comments

How does hypnosis work?

Can hypnosis help you to achieve your goals? According to the article on Scienceholic.org, the answer is yes. Hypnosis is a technique that can be used to reprogram your subconscious mind in order to achieve your goals. It can help you to overcome any obstacles that are holding you back and it can help you to stay focused on your goals.

Hypnosis is a trance-like state in which a person is more open to suggestion. It has been used for centuries to help people with various issues, such as weight loss, quitting smoking and reducing stress. More recently, hypnosis has been studied as a potential tool for improving work performance.

Studies have shown that hypnosis can improve task performance and increase motivation. In one study, participants who were hypnotised were able to complete a task faster and with fewer errors than those who were not hypnotized. In another study, participants who were hypnotised reported feeling more motivated to work and were more productive than those who were not hypnotised.

So how can you use this information to become a better leader? Here are three tips:

  1. Reduce stress with hypnosis. When you’re feeling overwhelmed, take a few minutes to hypnotise yourself and clear your mind. This will help you focus on the task at hand.
  2. Use hypnosis to increase self-awareness. When you know your triggers and how to deal with them, you’re less likely to let them impact your work.
  3. Practice self-hypnosis regularly. The more often you use hypnosis, the better you’ll become at it. This will help you stay calm and focused under pressure.

 

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So how can hypnosis help managers, business owners and supervisors? Hypnosis is a powerful tool that can be used to enhance leadership abilities and increase overall team productivity in any type of organisation or business setting. It provides an effective way for managers, business owners and supervisors to gain insight into their own thoughts and feelings so they can realise greater success in their pursuits as leaders.

Find out more in the original article here: https://www.scienceholic.org/post/the-science-behind-hypnosis

This article summary was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer, success coach and people skills expert. She helps managers and business owners build thriving teams and organisations, using tools from Positive Psychology. She's trained more than 60,000 people during her career as a corporate trainer and professional development consultant. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference. 

 

 

By Eleanor Shakiba Videos confidence 0 Comments

3 tiny words that power up credibility

This video comes with a free ebook, Beat Imposter Syndrome. Get your copy here. https://thinklearnsucceed.com.au/beat-imposter-syndrome-ebook-2/ Learn how to power up your credibility and influence, using standout language patterns. Discover how ‘chameleon words’ reduce your impact as a speaker. Then hear how regularly using three small words makes you stand out as a credible leader. Get tips for becoming a high-impact speaker from leadership consultant, Eleanor Shakiba.

 

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By Eleanor Shakiba Confidence tips 0 Comments

I’m a control freak… but I don’t let it control me.

Time to come clean. I’m a control freak. And I’m not the only one! In times of uncertainty many people react by trying to regain control. But that’s not a healthy way to lead yourself, your team or your business.

So, how can you tell that your ‘organised mindset’ is actually a sign that you’re in full-blown control freak mode? Here are three signs that are dead giveaways.

1. You’re stressing out about people knowing you’re stressing out

Yep, you’re not the only one who does this! It’s a surprisingly common way of thinking among people with imposter syndrome, a distorted, unhelpful form of ‘metacognition’.

2. You believe you are 100 percent responsible for your own success

You give yourself no leeway. If something goes wrong, you scold yourself. Then you start working on making it go right again. You say things like “failure isn’t an option” and there’s no such thing as good enough.” You over-schedule, over-commit and over-work. And still, you want to achieve more

No. It’s not ambition or a good work ethic. It’s a sign your confidence very likely needs a reboot.

3. You self-compassion battery is totally flat.

Self-compassion is a form of support and nurturing you give yourself when you make mistakes, face embarrassing situations, or encounter adversity. It’s like a battery; when it’s low, you don’t have the energy to enjoy your life. But t it can be recharged – and there are good reasons to keep it fully charged.

Paul Gilbert is a research scientist who studies the neuroscience of self-compassion. He claims that three brain systems work together to help you handle adversity and survive in chaotic times. Your ‘mammalian care-giving system’ is one of these systems. When it’s outward-facing, it enables you to feel, and show, compassion for those around you. But it can also be inward-facing. In this case, your care-giving system promotes a sense of self-security and stability.

 

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By Eleanor Shakiba Confidence tips 0 Comments

4 self-care habits that damage your confidence

Self-care is often touted as the guaranteed cure for low confidence and the antidote to imposter syndrome.  But guess what? This isn’t true. Just like it’s foolish to take antibiotics for every little ache and pain, it’s silly  to apply generic self-care practices as a cure for low confidence. How I’m not saying self-care is a bad thing. However, some self-care practices are more likely to damage your confidence than build it. Four of these are very common

Habit 1: Using minimising language

Some words unconsciously minimise your message and destroy your credibility. But many people (especially women) use these words in a vain attempt to fit in. For example, imagine a conference speaker who starts her presentation with the words “This isn’t really my area of expertise”. She certainly doesn’t sound confident and I bet she doesn’t feel confident, either.

Habit 2: staying in your comfort zone

I get it. You’ve been told that looking after yourself means reducing stress and saying ‘no’ to overloading yourself. Unfortunately, if you have low confidence this is the worst advice you can take, because it stops you learning. Believe it or not, confidence increases as your  willingness to learn builds. So, start challenging your assumptions about what’s possible and move into the learning zone.

Habit 3: Critiquing yourself all the time

Okay. Critiquing your own performance can be a great way to build your motivation to do better.  But when done excessively, self-critique turns into self-criticism. It quickly erodes your self-confidence. Plus, it turns into a habit which can be challenging to break. Resist the temptation to look for what you ‘should’ be doing better. Instead, focus on putting your strengths and passions to good use as a leader. Work with a coach or mentor if you need help doing this.

 

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Habit 4: Making contingency plans for everything

Yes, it does make sense to have backup plans for important parts of your life and work.  But having ‘just in case’ plans for everything is a clear sign that your need for control is …out of control. Remember that confidence doesn’t come from being in control. It is stronger when you believe in your own coping skills. Build those and suddenly confidence will be your default state.

Of course, self-care is important. However, it is important to make sure you’re practicing the right kind of self-care. Poor self-care habits can damage your confidence and stop you from building the skills you need to be successful.  It’s time to break these habits and become a confident leader. Are you ready? Let’s get started!

This article was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer and success coach. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference.  Since discovering her passion for training and development, Eleanor has trained more than 60,000 people. She delivers face-to-face workshops for corporates, online masterclasses for leaders and Positive Psychology retreats for trainers, HR practitioners and leaders. 

By Eleanor Shakiba Videos resilience 0 Comments

4 signs you’re overworking

Do you frequently feel rushed, out of time, or stressed? If so, you’re probably working too hard. High achievers tend to push themselves to exhaustion. You may also fear asking for help. These issues limit your efficiency and ability to achieve goals. Instead of working yourself into burnout, you need to manage your mind and your habits. Find out how to recognise the early signs of burnout – and what to do about them – in this  short video by mental stamina coach, Eleanor Shakiba.

 

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By Eleanor Shakiba Confidence interesting articles 0 Comments

What causes narcissists to be spiteful: no, it isn’t you!

Are narcissists truly mean, competitive and jealous? In the article “What Makes Some Narcissists Mean, Competitive and Jealous” posted in Psychology Today, readers are provided with a comprehensive overview of the phenomenon of narcissism. The article delves into the psychological development of narcissists and reveals the factors that contribute to their behaviours. The article explains that most severe narcissists had likely suffered from emotional trauma during a crucial developmental period, which resulted in their self-centred traits. Furthermore, it is revealed that these individuals do not have an awareness of boundaries when they become triggered, meaning they will do anything to get what they want.

The implications of this kind of behaviour are particularly relevant to managers, business owners and supervisors who must work with narcissistic employees or colleagues. Not only is it important for these professionals to understand that their team member’s narcissistic tendencies stem from a deeper-seated issue, but also be aware of how such issues can manifest in workplace interactions. For example, how some narcissists may act out through manipulative tactics or become overly controlling and aggressive when in positions of power. It is important for employers to be able to recognise these warning signs before allowing someone’s ego to take control and destroy morale or productivity in the workplace.

In addition to outlining the causes and effects of narcissistic behaviour, the article provides tips on how leaders can effectively manage such individuals in their teams without damaging relationships or imposing further stress on them due to their underlying condition. These tips include providing consistent feedback on performance as well as finding ways for them to develop emotionally so as not to trigger any potential flare ups due to unresolved past issues. Additionally, leaders should strive for clear communication within teams so as to avoid misunderstandings which can lead to unnecessary confrontations between members; something which narcissists may often initiate when feeling threatened or unappreciated..

 

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In addition to outlining the causes and effects of narcissistic behaviour, the article provides tips on how leaders can effectively manage such individuals in their teams without damaging relationships or imposing further stress on them due to their underlying condition. These tips include providing consistent feedback on performance as well as finding ways for them to develop emotionally so as not to trigger any potential flare ups due to unresolved past issues. Additionally, leaders should strive for clear communication within teams so as to avoid misunderstandings which can lead to unnecessary confrontations between members; something which narcissists may often initiate when feeling threatened or unappreciated.

It is clear that understanding the dynamics behind narcissistic behaviours is paramount if we are looking towards creating healthy working environments free from unnecessary conflict or strain caused by egos run wild.  Although it is important to remember that nothing can replace professional therapy for those who may struggle with the emotional trauma associated with their particular condition.  By becoming cognisant of these issues, leaders can not only help protect themselves from potential liabilities but also create a safe environment in which team members can work together in harmony.

Find out more in the original article here: https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/insight-is-2020/201807/what-makes-some-narcissists-mean-competitive-and-jealous

This article summary was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer, success coach and people skills expert. She helps managers and business owners build thriving teams and organisations, using tools from Positive Psychology. She's trained more than 60,000 people during her career as a corporate trainer and professional development consultant. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference. 

 

By Eleanor Shakiba Videos confidence 0 Comments

Change does NOT always take a long time

This video comes with a free ebook, Beat Imposter Syndrome. Get your copy here. https://thinklearnsucceed.com.au/beat-imposter-syndrome-ebook-2/

You want to change the thinking and behaviour patterns that are holding you back. You’d love to reach your full potential and overcome imposter syndrome, low confidence and ‘bad habits’. Yet, you’ve been told success takes years of effort and ‘working on yourself’. Newsflash: this just isn’t true. Hear leadership trainer and success coach, Eleanor Shakiba, explain why you need to ditch the ‘slow change is deep change’ myth. Discover how fast, effective and long-lasting change can be once you have the right tools at your disposal

 

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