Break the shackles of goal glut now

It’s the start of the year and already you’re exhausted. There’s too much to do and you have so little time to focus on what matters.  If this sounds familiar, take a deep breath. You might be suffering from Goal Glut, which is what I call that state of overwhelmed agitation that comes from taking on too many goals at once.

Despite what you’ve probably been told when setting KPIs at work, success does NOT come from having multiple goals. Once you have more than three things to focus on, you’ll feel scattered, tired and unproductive. That means you’ll show up to work in Stalled Go Getter mode. Here’s what that looks like.

  • The goals that matter to you have been put on hold for so long that they are more frustrating than inspiring.
  • You never have time to work on the important things, even though you want to.
  • Everyone says you’re a high achiever. But you don’t believe it.
  • Your once- rapid career progress has stalled. You’re starting to feel like you’re not living up to your potential.
  • You want to be back in control and be the unstoppable force you used to be.

So how do you transform into the unstoppable achiever that you want to be? The answer is to focus on momentum, rather than action. Momentum is that magical state where you feel unstoppable, motivated and in control. Momentum happens when you’re in the zone and making progress towards your goals. And over the next few weeks, I’ll be giving you tips on how to do exactly that. Without adding another dozen tasks to your To Do list!

 

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Start today

For now, take a moment to consider the most important question of all: What do YOU want to achieve this year? If you could only pick one goal to focus on, what would it be? That, my friend, is your One Big Goal. Don’t let Goal Glut hold you back from achieving it. And watch out for my next newsletter, because I’ll be sharing my top tips on how to create momentum and make this your most successful year yet.

This article was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer and success coach. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference.  Since discovering her passion for training and development, Eleanor has trained more than 60,000 people. She delivers face-to-face workshops for corporates, online masterclasses for leaders and Positive Psychology retreats for trainers, HR practitioners and leaders. 

Speak with impact: a leader’s guide to assertiveness

When it comes to being a successful leader, being assertive is key. Assertiveness can help those in leadership positions to be more effective and efficient. The article cites examples of how being assertive can help leaders to stand up for themselves and their team, make better decisions, and manage difficult conversations with confidence.

The first step is to be aware of the different types of communication. There are three basic types: passive, aggressive and assertive. Passive communication is when you do not express your feelings or needs. Aggressive communication is when you express your feelings or needs in a way that is harmful to yourself or others. Assertive communication is when you express your feelings or needs in a way that is respectful to yourself and others.

The second step is to practice using assertive communication. This can be done by using the “I” statements below:

“I feel…”

“I need…”

“I want…”

For example, “I feel like I’m not being heard.” “I need more time to think about it.” “I want you to stop interrupting me.”

The third step is to use assertive language. This means using clear and direct language. For example, “Can we discuss this later?” instead of “Can we talk about this later?” or “I’d like a raise” instead of “Maybe we could discuss a raise?”

The fourth step is to be aware of your body language. Your body language should be open and relaxed. For example, uncross your arms and legs, keep your head up, and make eye contact with the person you are speaking to.

The fifth step is to practice self-compassion. When you make a mistake, be kind and forgiving towards yourself. Forgive yourself for not being perfect and accept that you are doing the best you can.

 

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The sixth step is to be mindful of your triggers. Triggers are things that upset you or cause you to react in a certain way. For example, if someone cuts in line, this may trigger feelings of anger or frustration. Be aware of your triggers and try to manage them as best as possible.

The seventh step is to set boundaries. Boundaries are limits that you put on how much you are willing to do for others. For example, you may set a boundary stating that you will only work eight hours per day or that you will not take work home with you. boundaries help protect your time and energy so that you can focus on your own goals and needs.

The eighth step is to practice assertiveness regularly. The more often you practice assertiveness, the easier it will become for you to use it in difficult situations. Remember that practice makes perfect!

So why is assertiveness so important in leadership? Well, because it allows you to get results without resorting to bullying or manipulation. It also sends a message to your team that you’re willing to work through disagreements respectfully and that you respect them enough to give them a voice. Being more assertive can lead to better communication, improved decision making, and increased productivity. Assertiveness can also help build relationships with co-workers and customers.

Find out more in the original article here: https://positivepsychology.com/assertiveness-in-leadership/

This article summary was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer, success coach and people skills expert. She helps managers and business owners build thriving teams and organisations, using tools from Positive Psychology. She's trained more than 60,000 people during her career as a corporate trainer and professional development consultant. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference. 

 

Strong purpose long life

Do you and your workforce have a sense of purpose? If so, recent research on mortality reveals this could be a key factor in protecting employee health, both now and in the future.

Recent research from the University of Michigan has revealed that having a sense of purpose may help to protect against cardiovascular disease and cognitive decline associated with aging. The article “Mortality Linked to Having a Sense of Purpose” published on Neuroscience News outlines the evidence behind this finding, with data from over 6,000 people aged 50 years or older who took part in the Health and Retirement Study between 1992 and 2010.

The key findings reveal that those individuals with a greater sense of purpose had lower risk of mortality overall, as well as death related to cardiovascular disease when compared to those without such purpose in life. Further, those with high levels of perceived purpose showed slower decline in mental ability over time than those without in comparison. This could have implications for managers, business owners, supervisors and employees alike.

Having an understanding that an individual’s potential health outcomes are linked to their sense of purpose can provide powerful motivation to take action within leading roles, particularly when managing employees who may be ageing or facing challenges due to poor health. It is important to create an environment where it is safe for employees to express their sense of purpose through meaningful work activities – something which has been shown to improve wellbeing outcomes for workers at all stages of life. Managers should focus on providing opportunities for employees to direct their energy towards meaningful tasks that take into account their own personal goals and values – as this has been found to increase engagement in tasks as well as foster higher performance overall.

 

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Furthermore, supervisors should seek out ways to ensure that everyone within the organisation feels they are making an important contribution; this could include setting clear expectations at the start of a role, offering feedback regularly during tasks or even just sharing success stories internally so team members feel valued and appreciated for their efforts. Each person needs to understand how their contributions make up part of the whole picture – something which will ultimately help them find meaning in work even as they age or face difficult situations outside the workplace.

Ultimately it is essential for managers and business owners across industries to consider how they can build staff capacity around having a sense of purpose by offering tailored support designed specifically for each individual’s needs — if we want our teams to stay healthy both now and later down the line.

Find out more in the original article here: (https://neurosciencenews.com/mortality-sense-purpose-21864/ )

This article summary was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer, success coach and people skills expert. She helps managers and business owners build thriving teams and organisations, using tools from Positive Psychology. She's trained more than 60,000 people during her career as a corporate trainer and professional development consultant. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference. 

 

What science tells us about hope

Can hope truly drive us to success? This is the question posed in the article, The Will and Ways of Hope, featured on Psychology Today. In this article, it elaborates on the idea of hope and how it can be used to help individuals reach their goals. How having a sense of optimism and belief that a goal can be achieved has been proven to increase motivation and allow people to work harder towards achieving that goal.

The article delves further into the different ways hope manifests itself; through persistence, courage, faith, conviction and taking risks. These are key components needed when striving for success. Furthermore, hope is necessary for managing stress as it provides strength during difficult times and serves as an “antidote” for low self-esteem.  It is also important to remember that hope should be realistic and achievable; otherwise, it will lead to disappointment

The author of the article concludes with emphasising that hope has the power to drive individuals towards their goals and dreams. It can be used as a tool for success when accompanied by determination and hard work, making it possible to have a positive outlook and strive for greatness. Therefore, the power of hope should not be underestimated as it can be a powerful source of motivation in achieving success.

 

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For managers, business owners and supervisors, understanding the psychology behind hope is essential in order to lead teams effectively. Instilling a sense of hope among employees must be done with thoughtfulness in order to motivate them in the right manner towards desired outcomes. Most importantly, leaders must understand how their own behaviour shapes the behaviours of their team members which requires careful consideration when conveying messages regarding expectations or setting deadlines.

The Will and Ways of Hope is an insightful article on the power of hope and how it can be harnessed to reach success. It highlights the importance of having a sense of optimism when striving for greatness and using it as a tool to motivate oneself. Being aware of the psychology behind hope is critical in order for managers, business owners and supervisors to effectively lead their teams.

Find out more in the original article here: https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/beautiful-minds/201112/the-will-and-ways-hope

This article summary was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer, success coach and people skills expert. She helps managers and business owners build thriving teams and organisations, using tools from Positive Psychology. She's trained more than 60,000 people during her career as a corporate trainer and professional development consultant. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference. 

 

Dna versus outlook: what science tells us about happiness

Have you ever wondered what the secret to happiness is? The ABC News article, “The Science of Happiness: What Makes People Happy,” dives deep into exploring what it is that makes us happy, and how business leaders can apply its findings to their own lives.

The article starts by looking at a study of identical twins raised in the same household who reported different levels of happiness. The study found that 40% of our happiness is within our control, and not predetermined by factors such as genetics or environment. It then goes on to explore the science behind why we feel happy, looking at research from neuroscience and psychological studies. It suggests that positive emotions such as contentment come from connecting with those around us, performing meaningful activities or work, setting achievable goals and challenges for ourselves, and taking care of our physical and mental health.

This article provides helpful insights for business leaders interested in improving employee satisfaction and productivity. Knowing that our level of happiness is largely within our own control should be empowering for managers and supervisors, reminding them that they have the power to make positive changes in their team’s work lives.  Encouraging employees to set achievable goals, taking regular breaks and engaging in meaningful conversations with colleagues are all simple actions that can have a positive impact on workplace satisfaction and employee engagement

Ultimately, the science of happiness is complex and individualised. However, understanding what makes us happy on a deeper level can help business leaders create more productive and

 

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Encouraging collaboration between employees, providing challenging tasks and goals while also offering support when needed, as well as promoting physical activity like yoga or meditation classes during lunch breaks can all help to create a happier workplace environment which will ultimately lead to higher job satisfaction amongst your workers.

In conclusion, while the science of happiness can be complex and unique to each individual, understanding its principles can provide helpful insights for business leaders looking to improve their team’s satisfaction and productivity. Encouraging meaningful conversations with colleagues, setting achievable goals together, and taking regular breaks are all simple ways business leaders can use these insights to.

Offering tools such as goal-setting plans, tips on creating effective teams, motivation techniques and stress management strategies this service is sure to give any manager or supervisor the resources they need to build an engaging workplace where employees feel valued and motivated.

Find out more in the original article here: https://abcnews.go.com/Health/story?id=4115033&page=1

This article summary was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer, success coach and people skills expert. She helps managers and business owners build thriving teams and organisations, using tools from Positive Psychology. She's trained more than 60,000 people during her career as a corporate trainer and professional development consultant. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference. 

 

 

The unwanted effects of being too agreeable at work

Have you ever considered the downside of being “too nice”? Have you ever thought about how your niceness might be having a negative effect on your career or life goals? Sure, being personable and agreeable is important, especially when you need to build rapport. However, being perceived as ‘too nice’ can lead to career stagnation and lack of advancement. This is a problem many women are raising in leadership development sessions these days.

Just how worried should you be about the dangers of being too agreeable? Well, in terms of your career development, I advise you to take it seriously. Here are some examples of how excessive agreeability can negatively impact smart people at work. Let’s start with Marie. She thought it was rude to interrupt, so she let her pushy colleague take over the closing meeting with a potential client. Then her colleague got the credit for the deal Marie had spent six months crafting. Marie lost out because she was too nice to speak up.

The same was true for David. His  boss asked David to rewrite a report his colleague had botched. David agreed, although he was sick of stepping in to cover his team-mate’s poor performance. This happened several times. Then his team-mate was promoted over David. When David asked his boss why, he was told that he was ‘not confident enough to lead’. How would you feel in that situation? I’d be pretty peeved, I must say. David was, too.

 

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Lara’s story shows being too nice happens to self-employed people, too. Her client kept insisting on changes that fell outside the scope of Lara’s freelancing contract. She did the work anyway; despite the fact it took days. She was not paid for this time. Her project was unprofitable. Lara felt stressed, resentful and burned out. All because she was too accommodating to say ‘no’ to an aggressive customer.

Stories like these are all too common. You might even have a few of your own. If that’s the case, you already know that being ‘too nice to speak up’ can stall your career. Here are just five of the consequences it can have:

  1. Your ideas and opinions aren’t taken seriously
  2. You are not seen as a leader
  3. You don’t get the recognition, rewards or promotions you deserve
  4. People take advantage of your good nature
  5. You become overwhelmed and burned out

The bottom line is this: agreeableness is a quality that can be overplayed. Why does this happen? It’s not just lack of assertiveness. It’s also social conditioning and the impact of organisational cultures that stress ‘corporate kindness’. Formalising kindness is a great idea, but we also should consider the need for professionals to set limits and boundaries. Otherwise, we risk increasing the number of people who suffer from the mindset I call Chameleon Syndrome.

This is an excessive eagerness to adjust your behaviour, in order to gain acceptance. It is the number one factor keeping women stuck in lower management, as well as a significant contributor to burnout and low morale amongst highly skilled professionals. However, it is possible to break free of this mentality and reclaim your power. If you’d like to find out how, please contact me to book a one-to-one session or arrange training for your leadership team.

This article was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer and success coach. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference.  Since discovering her passion for training and development, Eleanor has trained more than 60,000 people. She delivers face-to-face workshops for corporates, online masterclasses for leaders and Positive Psychology retreats for trainers, HR practitioners and leaders. 

 

 

 

What leaders need to know about narcissistic rage

Are Narcissists capable of understanding the consequences of their own behaviour? This is a key question when it comes to understanding the topic of narcissism and narcissistic rage. According to a recent article on Psychology Today, this is an important concept for managers, business owners and supervisors to understand.

The article provides insight into what drives narcissistic rage – it occurs when someone with a narcissistic personality feels they have been wronged or humiliated. A narcissist may be overly sensitive to criticism or failure and take out their frustration on those around them. They may also become vengeful if they believe that someone has wronged them in some way – whether deliberately or unintentionally – and will stop at nothing to get revenge.

The article outlines how managers need to be aware of these tendencies in order to protect against toxic workplace environments. She discusses how empathy, emotional intelligence and clear communication are essential for managing relationships with employees, customers or colleagues who display narcissistic traits. One key point she makes is the need for managers to provide honest feedback without being too critical; this encourages self-reflection which can help prevent someone from reacting with extreme anger or aggression due to feelings of humiliation or shame.

Managers should also be aware of potential triggers that could cause individuals with narcissistic characteristics to react inappropriately. These triggers could include anything from criticism, seemingly small slights (real or perceived), public humiliation, feeling undermined or disrespected and so on. It’s important that managers remain mindful of these potential scenarios and strive to create a positive work environment where everyone feels respected and valued as an individual.

 

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Above all else, the article emphasises the importance of self-awareness when dealing with narcissism – both in oneself and others. To develop healthy relationships within the workplace it’s necessary for everyone involved (managers included) to recognise their own vulnerabilities and respond accordingly should any issues arise during interactions with others. By having greater awareness one can better manage conflictual situations before they escalate into something more serious such as revenge-seeking behaviour from a narcissist.

Ultimately, understanding of the behaviour and patterns of narcissism is key to creating a successful work environment for everyone. By learning about and recognising the signs of narcissistic rage, managers can more effectively manage individuals who display these behaviours. With appropriate measures in place, it’s possible to create an atmosphere where everyone feels respected and valued – even those  with narcissistic tendencies.

Find out more in the original article here: https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/think-well/201910/understanding-narcissism-and-narcissistic-rage

This article summary was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer, success coach and people skills expert. She helps managers and business owners build thriving teams and organisations, using tools from Positive Psychology. She's trained more than 60,000 people during her career as a corporate trainer and professional development consultant. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference. 

 

 

Power up your influence with stories

How do stories affect the brain? According to the article, “stories activate the brain’s pleasure centers” and “this is because when we’re engaged in a story, we’re using many of the same cognitive processes that we use when we’re actually living our lives.” In other words, stories can help you learn and make decisions. Stories allow you to see the world from different perspectives, and to understand complex concepts in a simplified way. They also help you to remember information more easily.

Stories tap into your emotions and help you make connections between events. They also give you a sense of control over your environment, which is why they’re so popular in business. Stories activate the brain’s reward system, which is responsible for motivating you to learn and explore new information. They also help you to understand and remember information more effectively than straight facts or statistics. What’s more, stories can be used to change behaviours and attitudes – a fact that’s not lost on business owners and managers.

So why are stories so effective? Our brains are wired to pay attention to stories because they are a combination of both facts and emotions. This combination helps you learn and remember information more effectively than just facts or emotions alone. In other words, stories help you see the world in a more holistic way, and this is why they are such an important tool for learning and decision making.

 

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Managers, business owners and supervisors can use stories to connect with their employees and customers because storytelling is a powerful way to engage an audience and connect with them on an emotional level. Stories can help people to understand your point of view, connect with your values and see how your company operates. They can also be used to inspire people and motivate them to take action.

If you’re looking for a way to connect with your audience and inspire them to take action, storytelling is a powerful tool that you should consider using.

Find out more in the original article here: https://www.brainfacts.org/neuroscience-in-society/the-arts-and-the-brain/2021/why-the-brain-loves-stories-030421

This article summary was created by Eleanor Shakiba

Eleanor is a leadership trainer, success coach and people skills expert. She helps managers and business owners build thriving teams and organisations, using tools from Positive Psychology. She's trained more than 60,000 people during her career as a corporate trainer and professional development consultant. Her mission is inspiring talented people to become leaders who make a difference.