Category: Confidence tips

As the year comes to a close, I wish you the joy of learning and positive thinking. Whether the year has held huge success, or many challenges for you, December is a great time to pause and reflect. Experience is what makes you unique. Your ability to learn from, and reflect on, that experience is what makes you stand out.

Here are my favourite questions for ending the year on a learning note:

• What have been the most memorable experiences of the year?
• How do you feel about those experiences?
• What have you learned about your strengths?
• If you imagine using those strengths in the next year, how will you do things differently?
• What are you grateful for?
• Who will you share that gratitude with?

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Do you want to master the art of positive thinking? You’ll find food for thought in this short video featuring ten quotes from outstanding practitioners of positive psychology and NLP. The video will build your understanding of positive attitudes and how they develop. It will also give you lots of tips for changing your own thinking habits.

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Do you secretly fear you’re not up to doing your job? If you experience these feelings frequently, there’s a good chance you might be suffering from ‘imposter syndrome’. This is a strong and pervasive fear that you don’t really have what it takes to succeed.

So, if you think that you’re suffering from imposter syndrome, what can you do? Here are five ways you can use NLP to boost your confidence and stop imposter syndrome in its tracks.

Meta model challenge your internal dialogue

The meta model is a linguistic toolkit for challenging limiting language. People who suffer from imposter syndrome tend to have highly critical self-talk. You can use meta model questions to challenge this type of self-talk and shift to more constructive inner dialogue. To do this reword definitive language like, ‘I don’t know how to do this’ with alternative statements like ‘I can find out how to do this’. Also work to banish perfectionist self-talk. Instead of saying, ‘I will work back and finish it properly’ say to yourself, ‘I will finish it as well as I can, given the time constraints I’m under’. Listen to my free podcast Beat Imposter Syndrome with NLP for more advice on practical tips. Read more

Are you plagued by negative self-talk? Then it’s time to change your thinking habits. Find out how in this inspiring video on how to think positively, even in tough situations. Learn how to shift your negative self-talk by using cognitive reframing techniques. Change what your inner voice says and the tone you use when ‘talking to yourself’.

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You, or someone you know, needs help developing greater confidence or self-esteem. You’ve heard some people saying that training is an effective approach. You’ve read that coaching might help you see things differently. One of your friends is a keen advocate for counselling. How do you decide which approach will work?

First, it helps to understand the difference between the three approaches. This ensures that you’re working in a way that you feel comfortable with. Training is a group process which focuses on providing models and techniques for workshop participants to try out together. Because it is a group approach, you will find this most useful if you are willing to participate in class conversations and small group activities. Read more

If you’ve been told ‘just think positive’ you probably know how hard this advice can be to take. I’ve worked with thousands of people who want to be more confident and more positive. There are five things I know can help you ‘think positive’ in an easy and natural way.

When you hit problems, shift into solution-finding mode

I’m a big fan of being solution focussed. This means taking your attention away from the problem and looking for ways to solve it. There are five principles to keep in mind here:

• Resist asking ‘why’
• Ask ‘how can I solve this?’
• Focus on coming up with as many potential options as you can
• Be creative.
• Turn off logic while you brainstorm.

Taking this approach will program your unconscious mind to generate lots of ways of sorting out the problem. The more often you take a solution focussed approach, the easier it becomes to think this way. Read more

Do you want master problem solving? Or has someone said you need to be more proactive about sorting out issues at work? Then you need to watch this video right now. Learn how to use solution-focused thinking to find better solutions to problems. Discover what solution-focused thinking is and how it can boost your problem-solving skills today.

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‘Just think positive’. I’m sure you’ve had this advice at some point in your life. But is it good advice? What’s the evidence that thinking positive will really help? These are fascinating questions, which you should ask yourself before attempting to ‘think positive’.

Is thinking positive a good idea?

The answer depends on what you mean by ‘positive thinking’. In every day conversation, we refer to positive thinking as a one-off intervention. For example, a team member complains about something and the supervisor responds, ‘Just think positive’. This is less likely to reap good results, than a more systematic approach to positive thinking. One of my favourite quotes comes from an article by Richard G Moore who says ‘Good cognitive interventions do not always focus primarily on changing specific negative propositions’. He goes on to argue ‘that effective strategies for changing thinking tend to extend beyond a single thought to challenge mental paradigms’. Read more

Are you wondering what positive psychology is? Asking yourself how it’s different to other streams of psychology? Get a quick overview of this fascinating field, as I explore the uestion “What is positive psychology?” in an animated video. Learn about the science of studying what makes humans thrive.

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A confident woman is like the sun in a clear blue sky. She radiates energy, light and life. Sometimes, though, clouds can obscure your radiance. If you feel like your confidence is hiding behind dark clouds. It’s time to do a confidence makeover.

In my work as a success coach, I encounter five signs which tell me that a woman needs to do this. Are you showing these signs and if so, what can you do to revamp your confidence? Here are the tips I give my coaching clients.

You’re a nervous public speaker

Low confidence and stage fright go hand-in-hand, but if you want to make it in the professional world you need to conquer your fear of public speaking. Suggestions I give my clients on how to do this include making an effort to speak during meetings and attending a two or three day public speaking training program. Make sure that you find one that includes lots of opportunities to speak and get feedback. Read more