By Eleanor Shakiba COMMUNICATION • • • • 0 Comments

Framing an unpopular message

Got a difficult message to deliver? Here are some tips for telling people what they don’t want to hear.

If you need to break bad news, you need to frame your message carefully. Framing is all about choosing the right words – the words which will minimise resistance to your message. Giving bad news is never fun. Whether you’re telling someone they didn’t get the job or that their work isn’t up to scratch, you’ll probably be choosing your words carefully. Here’s how to frame your message effectively.

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By Eleanor Shakiba COMMUNICATION • • • • • 0 Comments

Four ways to say ‘no’

It’s a tiny word, but saying ‘no’ can seem a huge effort. Here’s how to say ‘no’ when you need to.

‘No, not now’

Sometimes you really want to say ‘yes’. You would be happy to help if only there was less on your plate. You really don’t want to miss out on that golden opportunity, if only you could fit it in. Be firm with yourself and honest with others. Let people know when you can accommodate their request, rather than saying ‘no’ outright.

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By Eleanor Shakiba COMMUNICATION • • • • • 0 Comments

The power of ‘no’

‘No’ is one of the most powerful words in your vocabulary. Here’s why.

‘No’ prevents overload

If you’re the type of person who can’t say ‘no’, life is probably pretty hectic. What’s more, you’re probably doing a lot for everyone else and not much for you. And the likely result is that you feel stressed and over-stretched.

So remember – it’s simply not possible to do everything. Choose what you can do and then say ‘no’ to everything else. Saying ‘no’ to others means you say ‘yes’ to a stress-free life

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By Eleanor Shakiba COMMUNICATION • • • • • 0 Comments

Set limits on unsolicited advice

Fed up with unwanted words of wisdom? Here’s how to handle advice you don’t need to hear.

Some people use advice giving to control you or put you down. Whether it’s the office know-all pointing out your mistakes or a pessimistic co-worker raining on your parade, don’t allow them to continue. There are three steps you need to take when dealing with unwanted advice.

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By Eleanor Shakiba Impact tips • • • • • • • • 0 Comments

Don’t let nasty comments get you down

Why do some people get a thrill from putting you down?

The answer is that they have low self-esteem. So don’t let their negativity get you down. These people only hold power over you because you’re uncomfortable about confronting them. Perhaps you’re not 100 per cent sure the remark was a dig. Or maybe you’re torn between wanting to burst into tears or telling them exactly what you think of them.

People who make biting remarks crave an audience. They rely on you listening passively. Don’t do it. Instead, respond assertively. When you challenge them, difficult people lose their hold over you immediately. Here’s how to do this calmly and resourcefully.

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By Eleanor Shakiba COMMUNICATION • • • • • • 0 Comments

Setting limits with over-talkers

Your time is precious. Here’s how to reclaim it from the timewasters.

Does someone you work with bore you to tears with twenty minute monologues? Frequently interrupt you by stopping by your desk for a quick chat that goes on forever? Being sociable at work is great. But if you resent your time being taken up by over-talkers, these tips might come in handy.

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By Eleanor Shakiba COMMUNICATION • • • • • • 0 Comments

Issues focussed language

Good intentions are often scuppered by a poor choice of words.

Focussing on the issue rather than the person is a good start to resolving conflict. Here are some tips for doing this.

More ‘I’, less ‘You’

Sentences which start with ‘you’ often sound like an attack. Reframe sentences into ‘I’ statements to make them less personal and accusing. Say ‘I feel angry when meetings start late’. Avoid saying ‘you are always late’ or ‘I’m angry because you are late’ (a ‘you’ sentence thinly disguised).

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By Eleanor Shakiba Dynamic leadership • • • • • • 0 Comments

Language that boosts team performance

What you say can make or break team dynamics.

Have you ever worked in a team full of complaining or negative people? If you have, you know the impact negative language can have on team relationships. Great teams speak positively. Here are some tips on how to follow this example.

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